Wildlife

On Tuesday, late afternoon, just before heading down to dumbo for the de Blasio campaign's primary night gathering, I stepped out the back door, and there was the iridescent green hummingbird, zipping it's snoot in and out of hot pink fluff and deep purple trumpets. That is one weird dinosaur, mister. J had been seeing it next door, and B sees it across the street every year, but this is the first time in the 11 or 12 years we've been in the house that I saw it. Then, down I go to dumbo for the election returns and Bill not only kept M. Green from reaching 40%, he finishes first! Runoff! Gonna have to do it again, you registered Dems, bigger and better.

Then, yesterday morning, there was the giant, giant spider. As big as the hummingbird, OK? Here's the deal. You know the WC off our kitchen? It's so small I have a recurring fantasy that I stand up off the seat too quickly and gouge my eye out (always the right eye) on the hook screwed to the back of the door. And the door itself scrapes against the wood floor when you open and close it (because the floor swells from the leaks described some vague elsewhere). Sooo, in this tight little spot I in one fluid motion sat me down and dragged the eye-threatening door shut before me, and there along the chittering drag of the door and floor is a spider that would choke an ox. Yipes! Not sphincter-relaxing! So I start pushing the door back open and away from me and it's chitter-dragging the spider with it by some gnarly mash that first I think is web but then I realize must be crushed leg(s?). I bolt, clutching my pantaloons, and go about my business in other parts of the house.

A couple hours later, just before leaving the house, I steel my nerve and peek in the WC. Wolfgang has freed itself from the trap and laid it's massive body against the floor-molding stage-left of the toilet. I tell myself it is dead. I imagine how many scavenging insects of what size will be needed to carry it away. I realize there is nooo way I am going to directly involve myself with it's removal. But this morning, the carcass is gone. Lori hasn't said anything. I can only assume that crows or feral cats broke into the house and dragged the thing away.

Meanwhile, I'm thumb-typing this on thingy in the back yard, and... the hummingbird is back. It can only signify that Bill de Blasio will win the run-off and be our next Public Advocate, or I will never get to use the downstairs WC again. Keepin' my fingers crossed and remembering that God helps those who help themselves, I'm volunteering for the campaign.
Sent via thingy.